Eels Eels Eels Eels

I've had some unexpected time off. Turns out unexpected time off is weird, you want to make the most of it but there are so many possibilities it is almost daunting. Anyway, I used the time to potter about East Anglia, seeing some of those things that I've taken for granted. And there seems to have been a very eely twist.

Started off in Constable Country: Dedham Vale, Flatford Mill and all. And saw people fishing for eels, I didn't realise that that was still a thing that people did. Turns out it is. Also turns out that that little corner of Essex is more touristy than I'd given it credit for. North Essex is really pretty.

Since then I've cycled to and through a host of pretty Essex vistas and villages: Pattiswick, Wakes Colne, Greenstead Green, Coggeshall, Earls Colne - for my money North Essex is prettier than Constable Country. Constable Country was just full of nettles and straggly thistles. Today's cycle was mainly fuelled by Elvis Waffles from the Little Book Cafe in Halstead.

Sorry I've digressed from the eels. I went to Ely, the City of Eels. I'd not been to Ely before (box ticked) turns out a. it's really pretty and b. It has a marina, which I really wasn't expecting. I should have expected it really. How else are they going to get the eels to market?

Whilst I was in the Ely area I visited Wicken Fen - I didn't really understand what all the fuss is about (probably eels) - give me North Essex any day of the week.

Stung

I got stung by a jellyfish. That's one of those tickboxes that I never really meant to tick, but now that it's done I'm more pleased about it than I should be. "Remember that time I got stung by a jellyfish" just seems to have more of a ring to it than "Remember that time we saw puffins". At the very least it's good for a self-indulgent blog entry.

Weirdly, I wasn't even meaning to be in the sea. I was going to sit and read on the pebbled area that constitutes a beach in Riomaggiore whilst Carys put in her tri-practice sea swim. But then she saw not one, but two octopuses (octopi? Mmm octo-pie) which was enough to entice me away from the book. Saw a few flavours of bold fish then felt an unpleasant burn on my elbow.

Now I don't know too much about jellyfish stings - the only person I can remember talking to about them nearly died (presumably because getting a shot of adrenaline to the heart makes for a good, memorable anecdote, whereas mediocre stories like this one, not-so-much) - so I got out of the water as quickly as possible to make it easier for people to administer the adrenaline shot / wee on my arm.

Given that I didn't appear to be dying (or indeed in any pain greater than a wasp sting. I opted against the stranger's urine treatment and went to the Farmacia, who seemed entirely ambivalent. Jellyfish stings, m'eh.

So yeah, relocated to Riomaggiore for the last two nights. That's a peculiar place. Couldn't find any eating opportunities between fast food and Michelin Guide, which meant we spent a lot of time eating mixed seafood from a cone and drinking cheap wine on the terrace.

Had a trip to Manarola, the fifth of the five lands, and maybe the prettiest. Technically we had two trips there, one by kayak which was mighty hard work and another by train, which would have been civilised if we hadn't had an impromptu walk to Volastra - the sixth of the five lands. 

Definitive Cinqueterra ranking:

(6. Volastra)

5. Corniglia

4. Riomaggiore

3. Monterosso

2. Manarola

1. Vernazza

Jiggle My Prickles

Who thought prickly pears would be so prickly? I realised my mistake (I used the paw not the claw, despite the best advice of a cartoon bear) pretty quickly and discarded

the juicy fruit straight away. Even then I was picking prickles from my fingers for twenty-four hours. Always take the advice of cartoon bears, kids.

Anyway, I'm in Cinqueterra. Vernazza to be precise. It's pretty, and colourful and uppy-downy, just like it's supposed to be. It has a multi-use harbour that can be used for watching sunsets, thunderstorms or anchovies. And a big, old walking route full of pretties. 

Made use of the walking route yesterday. Wandered to another two of the five lands. Visited Monterosso al Mare for lunch. That's the most commercial of the five (think sunbeds on the prom) but was way prettier than I expected with its wiggly streets, bold fish and unexpected, aerial graveyard. 

Corniglia is a wonky hat on top of a cliff. It looked spectacular from a distance but when you were in the thick of it, it just seemed a bit, erm, small. Tried the local wine and Italian Grape Ale - where beer and wine meet. Turns out there's a reason that that's not a thing. 

We couldn't fly direct to Cinqueterra so had a cheeky night in Pisa. I went to Pisa twenty years ago, but it was a smash and grab - Duomo, Tower, that photo, done. So I kind of assumed that there wasn't any more to the city than that. Turns out I was wrong: there's picturesque squares, buildings with shutters, hip riverbeach bars and Keith Haring's Totomundo painted on the end of a terrace. So apologies Pisa, I was quick to dismiss you. You're alright.

Those Flaws Almost Made Them Greater

It's been a while since I've been to the theatre. Gone is the regular once-a-fortnight theatre visit, replaced instead with the sporadic visits to those things-that-you-really-should-see. With that in mind, I went to see Harry Potter and the Shameless Money-making Opportunity, or whatever it is actually called.

First off, let's just say the stage craft was spectacular, to get that out the way. It really was.

Given that I had read the script a couple of years back and could remember almost nothing about it I'm surprised that I was disappointed in the story. It was just a contrived, over-long non-story. A clunky device to allow the "best" Harry Potter characters to be revisited. A grab-bag of lazy, self-indulgent references.

And don't get me started on the fact that it was two parts, neither of which could be stand alone.

Still the stage craft was spectacular. But if I just wanted spectacle I'd have gone to the circus.

Not All Those Who Rhondda Are Lost

I've spent a fair amount of time in the Valleys over the years but have never really explored the area, partly not wanting to be a poverty tourist but mainly common-or-garden laziness. Read drunkenness.

Turns out its all quite scenic. All those tiny settlements are full of faded industrial grandeur with topography that lends itself to views. Merthyr Tydfil is postcard pretty, who would have thought?

In nature news, I saw a stoat kill a rabbit. That's the first time I've seen a proper mammal-on-mammal kill. I didn't even get that on safari. Go nature.

Tied up in Notts

What do you know about Nottingham? Robin Hood, Notts Forest and that's about it? Time for some learning.

Nottingham takes its craft beer seriously. Not certain if it is significant when compared to other cities, or whether I have just become more attuned to it, but it was definitely noticeable. I mean you expect it in Brewdog, or a pub called Six Barrels but Rock City? I thought that that would be like any other rock club I've been to where they are just serving two for one blue WKD. But no, Punk IPA as standard, with Wild Beer and Tiny Rebel if you knew where to look.

Some other Nottingham things:
The Dragon would have been just another pub, although one with a good people watching scene, but it had a scalextric race track in a secret room at the back. Who even knew that was a thing?

Pizza Storm was Subway for pizzas. Not sure how it hasn't existed before. It was ace. Although fairly sure I'm not the only one whose natural tendency is to go over the top. Maybe too many people want all the toppings and they just have to spend all their profits on rolling people out the door.

Stopped at Melton Mowbray on the way back. The pork pie and stilton combo was accompanied by a folk festival. Which was nice.

Mushroom Mushroom

And a couple of firsts for the weekend:

1. Is a bona fide first; a something that I've wanted to do for a whole load of years first. I saw a badger. After spending last summer and autumn failing to get onto a badger watching session, a big old brock just ran across the road in front of us, like a massive, monochrome rat.

2. Brown bread ice cream. I didn't know it was a thing until it was given to me, and what a thing it is. So super tasty. Add brown bread ice cream to your bucket lists now.