By Water Cool

I'd forgotten how much I like Liverpool.

That sentence in no way does justice to anything. I've been a blancmange of nostalgia over the weekend, spending all my time pointing at things that aren't there any more.

So what's changed? First off the whole city centre has moved a couple of blocks south: something called Liverpool 1 has plonked itself on Quiggins and the Superlambanana (Quiggins rest in peace; the Superlambanana appears to have been multiplied like the Borg - which is a good thing. The more Superlambananas the better, I say). Le Bateau and Zanzibar have both moved, The Nation is being demolished and Probe Records has closed. Rapid is no longer on Rapid Road, the trees aren't growing through the church and they've finally sorted out the docks - the waterfront is looking super shiny.

But it's still Liverpool. Concert Square still sounds hellish, there's still vomit outside the Krazyhouse, the Raz is still terrible. Baa bar, Magnet, La Go and the Blob shop are all still there. Smithdown Road still hasn't been gentrified (although the Ten has become Five). Mathew Street is still full of Beatles tat. Albert dock is still full of lost hen dos. Chinatown is still weirdly anticlimatic. And most of all the city's still got more soul than any other city I can think of.

So thank you, so called Pool of Life, I'll try not to leave it so long next time.

Bringing Elizabethan Theatre to the Masses

So I've not been to a Christopher Marlowe play before. Bit of an oversight. He's one of the main ones, right? I figured I'd put that right and head to Doctor Faustus, you know the one up town with Jon Snow in. No, not Jon Snow from the news, the "You know nothing, Jon Snow" Jon Snow.

Turns out it wasn't a traditional version. It had been updated to the 1830s. Sorry, if that's conjuring images of Charles Dickens and stovepipe hats. I shall clarify, it had been updated for the 18-30s. I can't remember the time I last saw something so dumbed down (sex jokes, in jokes, slapstick - to be fair probably how Marlowe wrote it). But equally I think that this is the first time I upped the average age of an audience for an Elizabethan play.

Maybe getting people out the sleb mags is the way to get people into the more obscure fringes of theatre. Maybe get Joey Essex to do Ionesco, you may have to imply that it's a Greek Island with a banging club scene...

History Repeating

Have you been blogging with me from the start? Do you remember those early ones from travellercliche? If so you may notice a bit of a pattern: Buenos Aires, a flight to the south of Argentina to see some ice, back to BA. Well to keep that trend alive I'm in Colonia del Sacramento in Uruguay...

Urug-why? Erm.

Anyway, where were we? Ushaia, with its hotchpotch planning laws and volatile weather. Turns out Ushaia is crazy expensive: the trip to Tierra del Fuego national park just about bankrupted us. Added to that we weren't made to feel especially welcome, partly due to absolutely nothing being open on a Sunday and partly because it was a celebration of Las Malvinas in the self-declared Capital of Las Malvinas. Which possibly isn't the best place to be British.

So yeah, back to BA and then straight on to Colonia. Seven years ago I found Colonia a bit boring, but pleasant enough to wander about in the summer sun, witg its palm trees and hummingbirds, so when it was suggested this time I didn't straight up refuse. Turns out the summer sun is fairly key to that enjoyment. Wandering around in the Autumn rain made for a bit less successful a visit. Ho hum. Hopefully my feet will dry on the boat to Argentina.

Number 7

I'm in Antarctica. Or at least I was when I wrote this. Strangely internet access doesn't seem great in this enormous desolate continent.

Getting here took a bit longer than it should. The Drake Passage was full of weather as we left, so we spent best part of a day hanging in the entrance to the Beagle Channel with sporadic dolphin activity providing the only real diversion.

We spent the first proper day in the South Shetland Islands. Half Moon Island provided the first penguin fix, with chinstraps rockhopping all over the place. For birds with no facial expressions, the amount of concentration on their face when rockhopping is impressive.

The afternoon was spent on Deception Island. Yes, that sounds like a Bond villain lair. Yes, it is in an active volcano. No, it is nowhere near as exciting as it sounds. It was a handful of ramshackle huts on a cold and rainy beach. It reminded me of Dungeness.

Day 2 saw the first continental landing, on Neko Harbour. Day 2 also saw the first snow. And the second snow. And third. Snow wasn't in any danger of not being part of the authentic Antarctic experience. Neither were dead penguins. The weather went pretty, erm, aggressive which meant the rest of the day was somewhat ship bound. Although we did manage to get the first whale sighting.

The weather was a whole heap better the next morning, which meant wildlife was out in force: double figures of humpback whales before breakfast. A trip to (the ridiculously scenic and penguin filled) Petermann Island followed before getting up close and personal with a family of whales.

Within twenty four hours whales had gone from never-seen phenomenon to curious backdrop to a barbecue.

That afternoon was spent cruising the so-called Iceberg Alley. Unsurprisingly saw a host of icebergs and a fair few seals, including a leopard seal and its teeth.

Melchior Island delivered more penguins, ice, rocks and seals. Paradise Bay delivered the exit through the gift shop moment - an enterprising Chilean ice station has set up a tiny museum cum post office cum souvenir shop. They seemed pretty pleased to see us, but then I guess that a boat full of idiots have more disposable income than the local religious penguins.

So yeah, two Drake Passage crossings under my belt, I feel like I've earned by sea legs. Been precipitated on on three different days on the self-styled driest continent, which almost earns me a weather badge. I've seen two different types of penguin, three types of seal, two flavours of whale and a host of icebergs.

Antarctica, the Big White Wilderness, the Last Continent: box ticked.